As I floored the zippy little Volvo C30 out of the showroom, the car dealer told me to relax on the accelerator a little.
For some reason, when I got into this little terror, it made me want to thrash it, use it and abuse it. I felt like taking it off road and driving it into objects, people, cars, damaging the car and seeing how far I could push it till it came to a stop.
Could I be going insane? Possibly.
What got into me? It’s a Volvo for Christ’s sake! Volvo’s aren’t meant to be fun and exhilarating! They are meant to be boring, mundane and for accountants who wear driving gloves.
This little 2.5 litre V5 beast really took me for a good time. It’s got a decent sized engine for such a small 4 seater car. It stuck to the road, like a slot car. I drove it like the way I used to drive my remote controlled cars as a child… They too stuck to the track, like my little Volvo.
It’s an agressive looking car from the front and sides. When you get to the rear, there’s something that distresses me. It’s got this ugly butt, but at the same time, it’s got something a little sexy about it. Like I want to pinch it for being so cute… But slap it at the same time for being so ugly.
Opening the big door was comforting and secure. As you would know by now, I’m big on the feeling of opening and closing doors. Sitting in the drivers seat is comfortable. A typical Volvo thing is comfortable seats, and that they were. Nice soft and plush black leather seats. The revolutionary floating dashboard seems bare. Where are the screens? Computers? I need gadgets. My fingers are bored. Plenty of buttons, but not enough screen action for my liking. When I asked for the option to have a pop-up navigation system, first thing I was told was “Oh that’s an expensive factory option, do you really need it?”
That didn’t sit well with me. Yes I do need it. I need it because I want it. I wouldn’t be spending $43,000 on a basic Volvo for fun! Anyway, if you want the option of sat nav and all the other little bits that go with it, try adding $5,000. Ridiculous! The sales person did also give me the option of a hard-wired Garmin suction cap navigator. Um…. NO.
I’m a sunroof/convertible kind of guy. When I asked for the option of a sunroof, again I got “Oh that’s an expensive factory option, do you really need it?”
Yes I do need it. I need it because I want it. I wouldn’t be spending $43,000 on a basic Volvo for fun?! Add another $2,500 for the factory fitted sunroof.
Looking at the instrument cluster. Boring. The interior colours. Boring. Seating arrangement. Boring.
The Volvo C30… BORING.
The only thing this car is good for is driving it into the ground. Treating it like a piece of meat and driving it like a mad man because you will love it! But when it comes to getting lost, some fresh air and light through the roof, or some advanced technology to fiddle with, you’re best off going to BMW, Volkswagen or Saab for a car that has more for $50,000.
Likes: It likes to be treated rough, factory sound system, seating comfort
Dislikes: Its rear, dash, technology level, expensive options, daggy Korean car looking instrument cluster, ugly key.
Would I buy it? Absolutely not. If I could afford to buy it as a golf buggy or something to bash and race around the paddocks, then yes I’d buy it. Or if I was an accountant who thought I was super cool driving a ’sports’ car.
